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Friday, June 22, 2007

How can I tell him that I’m not interested in a relationship without offending him? 

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"Dear Ai,
I go to an ESL school in Vancouver. I arrived two months ago. One of my Korean classmates seems to like me. He was very kind and I appreciate his help since I didn't have any friends when I got here. Other classmates think we are boyfriend and girlfriend. Because of this, many people in my class do not invite me to their parties. How can I tell him that I’m not interested in a relationship without offending him?" Masako – Japan

"Hi, Masako. Thank you for your e-mail. Misunderstandings happen quite often in relationships, especially when you and your friend are from different cultures. Since he hasn’t told you what he thinks about you yet, you cannot really reject him. You cannot assume anything, but I know many women can detect romantic feelings instantly! At this point, it is a good idea to tell him by describing your relationship towards him. Make sure you thank him first for helping you when you didn’t know anybody in Vancouver. Then gently remind him that you are not interested in a relationship, but you do appreciate his friendship.

You also told me that other classmates hesitate in inviting you for parties. Why don't you ask them first?? You can check a very good website about current Vancouver events at http://www.canadafootprints.com/calendar/month.php. Summer has just started, enjoy the rest of the beautiful beach season."

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